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Friends sit outside under a tree at sunset talking about living above offense.

Live Above Offense: Biblical Insights for Navigating Personal Conflicts

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In a world where disagreements and conflicts are part of everyday life, the ability to live above offense is not just valuable—it’s vital. This is especially true for Christians, who are called to a standard of love, forgiveness, and understanding that transcends worldly reactions. In this article, we’ll explore how biblical insights can guide us in navigating personal conflicts with grace, aiming for healing rather than division.

Understanding Offense

Offense can be likened to a seed. If allowed to take root in our hearts, it can grow into bitterness, resentment, and even estrangement. It affects us not only emotionally and spiritually but also impacts our relationships. I’m a recovering conflict-avoider. If I can just brush things off and not deal with them, that’s a good thing. Right? Well, personal conflicts, fueled by offense, often escalate because of a failure to address the initial hurt or misunderstanding in a constructive manner. Recognizing offense’s destructive potential is the first step toward living above it. Avoiding isn’t the answer: correctly handling the conflict well is.

Biblical Insights on Living Above Offense

The Bible offers some great wisdom on handling offense and personal conflicts. It’s not avoiding, it’s correctly handling. Here are some key Scriptures and teachings:

  • Proverbs 19:11 – “A person’s wisdom yields patience; it is to one’s glory to overlook an offense.” Patience, born from wisdom, empowers us to overlook offenses, choosing peace over conflict.
  • Matthew 18:15-17 – These verses lay out a blueprint for addressing offenses within the Christian community, emphasizing direct communication, privacy, and respect in the process of reconciliation.
  • Colossians 3:13 – “Bear with each other and forgive one another if any of you has a grievance against someone. Forgive as the Lord forgave you.” Here, the call to forgiveness is linked directly to the example set by Jesus, a standard of unconditional grace and pardon.
An open Bible on a dark wood desk offers wisdom for living above offense.

Steps to Living Above Offense

Applying these biblical insights requires intentional action. Here are several strategies to help you live above offense:

  1. Reflect Before Reacting: Take a moment to pray and reflect before responding to a perceived offense. This can help in understanding the situation more fully and responding in a way that aligns with biblical teachings.
  2. Communicate Openly and Honestly: Following Matthew 18’s guidance, if you’re offended, seek a private and respectful conversation. Clear, compassionate communication often resolves conflicts before they escalate.
  3. Practice Forgiveness: Forgiveness is a choice and an ongoing process. It liberates you from the burden of offense and opens the door to reconciliation.
  4. Seek Wisdom and Counsel: In times of conflict, don’t hesitate to seek wisdom from Scripture, prayer, and advice from trusted Christian mentors or counselors.

Real-life Examples of Living Above Offense

From historical figures like Corrie ten Boom, who forgave her concentration camp guards, to everyday stories of individuals forgiving betrayals and hurts, countless examples demonstrate the power of living above offense. One mother, who lost her son to murder, forgave her son’t killer and took him under her wing. These stories not only inspire but also illustrate practical applications of biblical principles in resolving conflicts.

Living above offense isn’t easy, but it’s a rewarding path that leads to deeper peace, stronger relationships, and a more profound witness to the grace and forgiveness we’ve received through Christ. By applying the timeless wisdom found in Scripture, we can navigate personal conflicts in a way that honors God and fosters genuine healing.

Further Reflection on Living Above Offense

Listen now to the short version of this Abide meditation based on Colossians 3:13. Let God speak to your heart about forgiveness and living above offense by others.

For more help on living above offense, download the Abide app. Our more than 1500 guided meditations all exist to help you experience the peace of Christ. A premium subscription gives you access to our entire library of content. Here’s 25% off to get you started.

Stephanie Reeves is the senior editor for Abide. She and her husband live in Orlando, Fla, as do their 3 adult children and 1 adorable grandson.